Forget about the fat cats and the camel’s eye: The obese may soon have to pay tax to enter Hell

ST-WIGAN

I’ve said it quite a few times before but the way so many people live in the West is totally disgusting. We are burning up the earth’s natural resources and stuff our collective faces, while a good proportion of the rest of the world’s population starves.

There is an ironic side to this, of course. Thanks to our revolting eating habits, a large percentage of the West’s popultion is now morbidly obese, which means there are now about as many people dying from overweight related heart diseases, diabetes and cancers in the West as there are people dying during your average famine in Ethiopia.

Talking of morbidly obese, by the way, the following story in the Telegraph had me snigger like a fat man who’s been given the Keys to the Kingdom of McDonald’s:

“A report by Tunbridge Wells Borough Council has found an increasing number of cases where bodies will not fit properly in furnaces at Kent and Sussex Crematorium. At present bodies which are too big to be dealt with have to be transported to larger crematoria which can accommodate them in south London or Sittingbourne. But the council is now considering charging more for cremations involving bigger coffins to help pay for improvements costing up to £1.7million.”

There’s something so right about this, and so elegant too.

I mean, we already have airlines charging fat folks extra to take them close to Heaven – and now these same people have to pay a tax in order to get a taste of what might await them when they end up at the other side of that Biblical equation.

As divine statements go, this one sure beats the crap out of the old ‘And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God’ routine

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