Fucked by the police? Well, join the club…
(So, here’s the fucking cop when you need him…)
Now, I know how the police like to bang on about things like ‘care in the community’ but this is ridiculous:
Greater Manchester Police chief Mike Todd, found dead on a Welsh mountain, had relationships with 38 women while he was a chief constable, according to an official report. The tangled love life of the head of Greater Manchester police is being investigated to see if it affected his ability to do his job or put national security at risk.
In America, of course, the police motto is ‘Protect and serve’. So, let’s hope this eager beaver cop at least used some kind of protection, while he served and screwed himself a way through the Greater Manchester area.
By the way, I love that expressed official doubt, whether the behaviour of our bluebell Casanova MIGHT have affected his job. Maybe those who decide on these kinds of investigations are all single but those of us who are not that much into DIY already know that having a relationship with one person will, at times, affect all other aspects of your life. Fucking around with 38 persons will most definitely do that for you.
Still, I doubt that our industrious officer breached national security while breaching all those girdles. As far as I know, Al Qaeda & Co. are not really into those types of, let’s say, fucking fatwas. I know that there are quite a few organizations who don’t mind women acting as suicide bombers but I think they would definitely draw the line at Mata Hari style sex bomb campaigns…
… and I do think that even our lust blinded bobby would have noticed if one of his playmates had sported the obligatory beard over his modestly long robes. So, in that sense at least, the nation may sleep in peace.
Which, obviously, is not something you can say for all the men in the Greater Manchester area, who might now very well be worrying whether their wives and girlfriends were also, at some point in time, helping the police with their inquiries.
If you enjoyed this post, subscribe today to get free updates by email or RSS.
