There’s something about Viagra: Ten good reasons to stay limp

A few weeks ago, I came upon an article, called ‘Viagra: 10 things you need to know.’ Now, I don’t like to be told what I need to know – but I’m also incurably curious, so I did read the damn thing. It was a pretty uninspiring list, to be honest, although the seventh item on it was of some interest:

The most common side-effects associated with Viagra are headache, flushing, dizziness, palpitations, indigestion and blurred or blue- tinged vision.”

Which did nothing to change my views about the desirability of the product. Not so much the flushing, dizziness, palpitations and/or indigestion part. A weekend of fairly heavy drinking or listening to John McCain talking about his ‘Good-Friend-Joe-The-Plumber’ has more or less the same effect.

No, it was that ‘blue-tinged vision’ bit that had me worried. I mean, there you are, in bed, with a throbbing hard-on and a naked woman, who now, before your eyes, turns into a fucking smurf…

Not good.

Anyway, as I said, nothing on that list convinced me that I really needed to try the stuff out. In fact, it just put me in the mood for making a list of my own. Call it, ‘Ten good reasons to embrace impotence‘:

1) Heather Mills

2) Marge Simpson

3) Sharon Stone

4) Paris Hilton

5) Miss Piggy

6) Lorena Bobbit

7) Tammy Winette

8) The Borg queen

9) Sarah Palin

10) Mallory Knox

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