Bad poets cause global warming
Science is cool - but first, let me digress a little bit; just for one short paragraph…
So, we know about art imitating life – and, sometimes, of course, life imitating art – but what would happen if human inventions would imitate their natural equivalents, which still are, in many ways, their betters?
Which thought leads us to the following bit of news, concerning yet another scientific discovery; one that I find just a little bit worrying:
Deciduous trees use an elaborate cellular mechanism to part company from their leaves, which act as “solar cells” in the summer but become superfluous in the darker winter months. At the base of each leaf is a special layer called the abscission zone. When the time comes in autumn to shed a leaf, cells in this layer begin to swell, slowing the transport of nutrients between the tree and leaf. Once the abscission zone has been blocked, a tear line forms and moves downwards, until eventually the leaf is blown away or falls off. A protective layer seals the wound, preventing water evaporating and bugs getting in.
You see, these trees shed their solar cells when they don’t need them anymore. Which is all very good and well if you’re a tree – but what about our human homes? Houses are not as smart as trees, so maybe they will just blindly follow the latter and also shed their solar panels the moment the days grow shorter, not realising that, unlike trees, houses can’t grow these things back again come spring.
Anyway, I’m not so sure these scientists are right. All that stuff about cellular mechanisms, solar cells and abscission zones sounds impressive enough but I can’t say I find it terribly convincing.
Me, I think it’s poetry – or rather, bad poetry.
You know how some poets are always going on about spring and renewal, and summer-kissed meadows and what have you. Then, when fall comes around again, it’s all melancholy and the beauty of autumn leaves…
In other words, I think trees dropping their leaves is just an allergic reaction to all of this poetic waffling – which is, unfortunately, the only kind of ‘Fuck you, I’m out of here!” option open to you, when you have roots instead of feet.
Same with those melting ice-caps, I’m sure, or the expanding deserts. Forget about CO2 and greenhouse gasses. It’s not people driving cars that’s causing all these environmental problems. It’s bad poets driving mother nature round the bend who are to blame.
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