Indiana Jones attacked by stuffy relics from the World Archaeological Congress
Many, many years ago, I saw some kid’s toy in a shop. It was a small, plastic inflatable thingy. It basically was a swans’ head and neck, fixed to a ring. It was obviously a bath toy and you can imagine some toddler having fun with it. Same toddler could just about have stuck his or her arm through the ring that made the ‘body’ of the swan. It was a very small swan - let’s say half the size of an anorexic duck.
So, obviously, the toy came with the following warning, ‘This product is not a life saving device.’
Anyway, enough about that toy and on to today’s lesson, and today’s prayer, which is, ‘God help us - and save us from the pompous and the bloody boring’:
For all his swashbuckling adventures, the fictional Dr Jones would be found guilty of unethical and quite possibly illegal behaviour, the head of the said.
“In pursuit of ‘fortune and glory’ Jones ignores international treaties, treats human remains as weapons, and destroys archaeological sites in a bid to escape from potential entombment and other worrisome possibilities,” said Professor Claire Smith of Australia’s Newcastle University.
Hello, anyone in there with half a brain that isn’t completely mummified? These are movies: Hollywood action movies…
There’s a mandatory clause that states that no action movie will ever even look vaguely as if it cares or even knows about the laws of nature or the rules of logic.
In this movie our hero (reportedly) hides in a fridge to escape the effects of an atomic bomb… Now, I know that the producers of customer products have become a bit paranoid about possible law suits and have grown fond of making the most obvious and preposterous disclaimers on these products but I can’t see even them getting in a panic about this movie and suddenly producing labels that state, ‘This fridge is not a life-saving device during a nuclear attack’.
In other words, lighten up already - or return to your dusty tombs and bother us no more.
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