False tears, fake orgasms and a new machine that fucks up politicians!


They say there’s nothing as dishonest as a crocodile’s tears – or a politician’s laughter.

Okay, the same has been claimed about a hooker’s orgasm or a man’s promise not to come in his lover’s mouth but we’re trying to run a clean blog here, so we’ll ignore those similes.

More important than cleanliness even: I still have plans for that politician.

First this though:

For those who believe laughter is the best medicine, now there is a way to measure the dosage. Researchers at Kansai University have developed a machine that can scientifically measure the quantity and the quality of a person’s laughter.

The system distinguishes between real and fake laughter by closely monitoring the movement of the diaphragm — the thin sheet of muscle extending across the bottom of the rib cage, which separates the chest organs from those of the abdomen. According to Kimura, the diaphragm does not vibrate significantly when a person pretends to laugh, even when the person’s voice and facial expression appear genuine. On the other hand, when one laughs at something they truly find funny, the diaphragm generates 2 to 5 distinct vibrational waves per second.

Anyway, as I already said, forget about the hookers (and the boorish male lovers.) It will be our politicians who will have to worry most – if the article’s claims about the laughter machine are correct, of course.

If so, politics might never quite recover from it – and unlike those hookers, our politicians might have to learn a few new tricks if they want to keep our custom.

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One Response to “False tears, fake orgasms and a new machine that fucks up politicians!”

  1. Support this story on Stirrdup Says:

    False tears, fake orgasms and a new machine that fucks up politicians!…

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