Caught in the act: tales of corruption, nakedness, drunk driving and cat flaps
Let’s start with another bit of sordid news:
Hundreds of defendants sitting in prisons nationwide have been convicted with the help of an FBI forensic tool that was discarded more than two years ago. But the FBI lab has yet to take steps to alert the affected defendants or courts, even as the window for appealing convictions is closing, a joint investigation by The Washington Post and “60 Minutes” has found.
Yes, the FBI seems to want to emulate its political masters, in terms of corruption, callousness and contempt for the law of the land.
Still, the story also highlights that it isn’t always easy to find evidence against criminals and that trying to prove anything beyond reasonable doubt will often be quite complicated.
Of course, some things are easier to prove than others:
A male stripogram has been charged with wearing a police uniform and equipment in the street. Two police officers saw him and decided to take action.
Mr Kennedy, who is a genetics student at Aberdeen University, said:
“I said I was not a police officer, I said I am a stripper.
“They followed me into the bar, watched the show, then asked me to go back to the station. It was all quite friendly. When I went back later they said they were going to charge me. I have spoken to two solicitors and they do not know if it will go to court.”
One thing deplorably hard to prosecute and prove in court are cases of stalking and sexual harassment. All too often it will end up as ‘her word’ against ‘his word.’ So, sometimes innocent people are convicted and (probably much more often) the guilty walk free.
Not all the times though…:
Authorities in Florida launched an investigation into what they called one of the strangest accidents they’ve ever seen.
Investigators said 32-year-old Charles Tucker Jr. was using the cat door early on Saturday morning as a way to get back into his girlfriend’s St. Augustine home after she kicked him out.
Deputies said several hours after Tucker’s girlfriend told him to leave she found him stuck in the cat door.
Tucker’s girlfriend called 911 when she found the 32-year-old stuck, but when officers showed up four minutes later - he was already dead.
Not so much as case of caught in the act as caught by the cat flap.
So, that one was an open and shut case. I’d have said ‘unflappable’ but I already did one cat flap joke, so I won’t.
Anyway, while most people love ‘whodunnit’ stories, cops prefer their criminals stupid, unresisting and with their metaphysical trousers down. Like this father & son team:
A father and his son were arrested about 10:20 p.m. Nov. 8.
Police said they apparently were trying to get home when they turned into the city park to turn around. The truck rolled off the pavement and became stuck in the muddy soil, he said.
An officer on routine patrol went to investigate and was surprised to find a 13-year-old behind the wheel, with his father in the passenger seat, police said.
Open beer and schnapps containers were found in the vehicle, McLellan said.
“This is not your typical event,” the chief said.
A Montrose Township man told police he turned over driving duties to his 13-year-old son because he’d had too much to drink.
It didn’t help that the boy had been drinking, too.
Talking of being caught with your trousers down – and I’m not talking metaphorically anymore – I mentioned how it is so often the case that it is hard to prove things beyond a reasonable doubt, in front of a seen-it-all judge and a cynical, streetwise jury…
Well, to almost any rule there will be exceptions:
A German man who was appealing against a conviction for flashing didn’t help his case when he stripped off in court.
“The court withdrew for deliberations and during the adjournment the man removed his clothes again,” said a spokesman for the court in the city of Duisburg.
“It appears he sees it as art, and views himself as a living work of art.”
The 60-year-old was in court to appeal against his conviction for running onto the pitch naked during a girls’ soccer match and striking a range of ‘body builder poses’, the spokesman said.
State prosecutors filed fresh charges of indecent behaviour against the man after the court incident.
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