Ghosts, UFO’s and Michael Jackson: Halloween is coming to town
The clock is ticking…
Halloween is now almost upon us…
with the foul stench of witches, ghosts and pumpkins gone bad on the lawn…
and some more weird stories, of course:
WASHINGTON - It was bad enough when the TV and lights inexplicably flicked on at night, Misty Conrad says. When her daughter began talking to an unseen girl named Nicole and neighbors said children had been murdered in the house, it was time to move.
Put Conrad, a homemaker from Hampton, Va., firmly in the camp of the 34 percent of people who say they believe in ghosts, according to a pre-Halloween poll by The Associated Press and Ipsos. That’s the same proportion who believe in unidentified flying objects — exceeding the 19 percent who accept the existence of spells or witchcraft.
That makes it official: more Americans believe in ghosts than in their own president:
George W. Bush’s overall job approval rating has dropped to 25% as nearly seven in ten Americans say the national economy is getting worse according to the latest survey from the American Research Group. This matches the lowest approval rating for Bush recorded by the American Research Group.
By the way, talking of very scary guys – I mean: ghosts… It’s not just Americans who are superstitious. The Italians also have a thing for the supernatural (and electing their own dubious dictator presidents, come to think of it…)
Anyway, here’s what happened in a small town in Sicily…:
Canneto di Caronia, in northern Sicily, drew attention three years ago after residents reported everyday household objects bursting into flames.
Locals were quick to blame supernatural forces and at the time the Vatican’s chief exorcist Father Gabriele Amorth backed up their fears and said: “I’ve seen things like this before. Demons occupy a house and appear in electrical goods. Let’s not forget that Satan and his followers have immense powers.”
Mind you, just like Mussolini (or Bush) didn’t quite turn out to be what the idiot voters had expected, so these demons also proved to be somewhat of a disappointment:
Now in an interim leaked report published by several Italian newspapers it has emerged that the Civil Protection Department has concluded the most likely cause was “aliens”. The report was ordered by the Italian government and brought together dozens of experts including a NASA scientist. Their two year investigation has cost an estimated £1 million.
Right, now before everybody goes terribly Anglo-Saxon on me, sniggering at those silly & excitable Italians, wasting the taxpayers’ money on ghost hunts, consider this:
How much would you think it costs to build a zebra crossing?
A couple of workmen, a few pots of black and white paint, two Belisha beacons - it doesn’t sound like a lot.
Yet it emerged yesterday that the Highways Agency spends £114,000 on each new pedestrian crossing.
The figure for the familiar black and white crossing includes £11,000 for “design work”.
A further £16,000 is spent on the beacons, electrical wiring and road signs while the remaining £87,000 is swallowed up by labour costs, the equivalent of three and a half years pay for the average worker.
Back to ghosts though – and a very scary story indeed… Well, the story isn’t that scary – but one of its main characters sure is. People say, ‘You could scare little kiddies with a face like that.’
Indeed… And that’s even before the phrase ‘pajama party’ springs to mind.
So, on the whole it’s probably a wholesome thing that the guy has now become obsessed with a much, much older quarry…:
Singer Michael Jackson is reported to be bidding on a “genuine Irish ghost trapped in a bottle”.
The bottle, owned by retired mill worker John McMenamin from Spamount, County Tyrone, is for sale on eBay.
Since then, it has been reported in a national newspaper that an agent representing Michael Jackson is involved in the bidding.
Mr McMenamin discovered it partially cemented into a bricked-up window 25 years ago.
When her brother told her recently that he had the bottle, she decided to put it up for sale on eBay.
“I described it as a genuine Irish ghost in a bottle. We wanted to get somebody who would treat it with respect,”
Well, there you go… You truly & deeply & utterly respectfully try to flog a ghost on E-bay and who turns up? Michael bloody Jackson. Indeed, it is as they say, No good deed ever goes unpunished.
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