This is My flesh: Now have a chocolate fondue…
Some decades ago George Harrison recorded a song, called ‘My sweet Lord’ which was, indeed, quite sickeningly saccharine and tooth-ache inducing.
So much so, that when, decades later the following story appeared in the papers I fully sympathised with the RC church, for the first and most probably last time in my life:
A New York art gallery has decided to cancel an exhibit of a chocolate sculpture of Jesus Christ after protests by a US Catholic group.
The six-foot (1.8m) sculpture, entitled “My Sweet Lord”, depicts a naked Jesus Christ with his arms outspread.
The sculpture, by artist Cosimo Cavallaro, was to have been displayed from Monday at Manhattan’s Lab Gallery.
The timing, over Easter Holy Week - the most important part of the Christian year - provoked an outcry.
The Roger Smith Hotel housing the Lab gallery decided to cancel the exhibition after the Catholic League for Religious and Civil Rights called for a boycott.
Alas, like Rambo pictures, Paris Hilton, periods and other most unwelcome phenomena, some stories can be buried but will always rise again, like a cash-hungry & vapid Hollywood vampire:
NEW YORK (Reuters) - A life-size chocolate sculpture of a naked Jesus will finally be displayed in New York starting in late October, seven months after an outcry by Roman Catholics forced a different gallery to cancel its exhibition.
The chocolate Jesus will be joined by sculptures of several fully clothed saints, but the Catholic League for Religious and Civil Rights said it will not protest because, unlike before, there are no plans to put the “anatomically correct” Jesus in public view during Holy Week.
The Proposition gallery in Manhattan’s Chelsea neighborhood will present “Chocolate Saints … Sweet Jesus,” an exhibition timed to coincide with All Saints’ Day on November 1. The show will run October 27 to November 24.
Mind you, the church was always fighting a losing battle here. I’m not sure what it is with the George Harrisons of this world, but to some people chocolate goes with Christ as Hannibal with Lecter:
In Colombia, the image of Jesus has been seen on the side of a mug of hot chocolate. Specifically, the face appeared on the side of the mug in a pattern of drips. Because this week, the week before Easter, is known as “holy week” by the Catholic Church, the are rumored to be investigating the appearance. In the meantime, a shrine has been set up for visitors to view the cup in the kitchen where it was discovered.
And when it’s not Jesus – Man or Boy – discovered in or covered with chocolate it’s His Momma:
FOUNTAIN VALLEY, Calif. — Workers at a chocolate factory located at 17290 New Hope, in Fountain Valley, claim the Virgin Mary has appeared as a chunk of chocolate.
They claim the chocolate dripped down and formed a small statue resembling a drawing of the virgin Mary.
Workers have placed rose petals and candles around the figure.
All of this can lead to some thorny if captivating chunks of faith-based speculation of the ‘What would Jesus do?’ variety – and, more to the point maybe, to the sticky question of who would have the true belief, or balls, to follow in His footsteps?
Well, this guy had:
Kenosha, Wis. — It might sound like a chocoholic’s dream, but stepping into a vat of viscous chocolate became a two-hour nightmare for a 21-year-old man Friday morning.
Darmin Garcia, an employee of a company that supplies chocolate ingredients, said he was pushing the chocolate down into the vat at Debelis Corp. because it was stuck. But it became loose and he slid into the hopper.
It was in my hair, in my ears, my mouth, everywhere,” said Garcia, who has worked at the company for two years. “I felt like I weighed 900 pounds. I couldn’t move.”
The chocolate was 110 degrees, hotter than a hot tub, said Capt. Greg Sinnen of the Kenosha Fire Department.
Co-workers, police and firefighters tried to free the man but couldn’t get him loose until the chocolate was thinned out with cocoa butter.
Enough with the chocolate already.
Although…
Okay, if you think being covered with chocolate is bad, spare a thought for the visitors of a certain ballet, ‘The Snow Queen.’
It was a night to remember when Duncan Poulter took his wife to a performance of The Snow Queen at Bristol Hippodrome.
They were showered with pigeon droppings during the ballet and performed their own pirouette, fleeing their £17 seats.
“During the first part we could hear a dull thudding noise, which we discovered was pigeon droppings falling on to a gent in front of us,” said Mr Poulter, 60, a retired engineer.
“We could also smell bird droppings, and the seats in front of us were splattered with them too … We had just got into the second part when I was hit with a real dose of it.”
The Hippodrome, which said it had offered to pay Mr Poulter’s dry-cleaning bill, admitted yesterday: “Over the last few months we have had a few unfortunate incidents with pigeons getting into the building and accessing the auditorium.”
“Accessing the auditorium…” Brilliant!
Or, in the immortal words of Bing – and countless others, ‘Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow…!‘
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